Hello, I was excited to read this post by one of my favorite instgrammers neurodivergent_lou. I felt very validated to hear another autistic person talk about autism and touch.
https://www.instagram.com/p/Clwd8Zussfg/
Yes, there’s a stereotype that people with autism don’t like touch. But issues with touch can play out in many ways. In fact I love touch, to the point that it can derail me. It has to be under certain conditions.
My housemate asked how I am sharing space in a kitchen. I explained how mutual, consensual touch is great with me, like hugs and holding hands. But being bumped makes me lose my shit. First bump I’m sort of ok. Second bump I freak out. Third bump, I leave the room, never to return. Ok, maybe I’ll return in a few days, if I have to.
Bumping the onion basket counts as a bump, strangely. So we moved the onion basket, which I had been bumping on a daily basis. Earthquakes count as a bump also. Jeeze, Parent Earth! Watch your boundaries.
eye contact
Reminds me of eye contact. We autistic folx have a stereotype of avoiding eye contact also. Actually I love eye contact. I love it so much that it can be overwhelming, so I sometimes avoid it, because I want it too much.
Eye contact means a lot to me, so sometimes I can’t do it for very long. It can be tied into trust, vulnerability, and norms. Norms are a struggle for me to comprehend.
As for hugs and other physical contact, I would like to be hugged always, by people I trust such as my spouse Ming. Always or never is a hard place to be. Moderation is so confusing, to decide.
lizard need
Sometimes I wish I was a cute little lizard and could ride around on Ming‘s shoulder. He could pat me comfortingly from time to time, and I could give him a small lizard kiss on his ear, when the spirit moved me.
This is not a very possible need. Disability is a pain in the ass, seriously.
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